I felt very apathetic yesterday about my clients, not that they've brought their life situation on themselves or that they deserve it, but just kind of a - why do we keep on trying to save everyone - feeling.
I'm not even going to try to help you "not get me wrong", too tired for that.
But I read an article about adoption, "shotgun adoption" and it just makes me angry, probably unjustly so. It makes me angry at how the world is, how things will never be perfect nor close to perfect, and how Jesus promises us that we will face troubles and people who disagree with us and mock/demean/push down/any thing negative - us.
And I'm doing a group project about community education, using sexual education as a model. And I'm sick of people justifying people sleeping around because they didn't know better, because they didn't learn how to be safe in high school, because "abstinence only" education sucks/is stupid/doesn't work/is for morons, because we all have rights and freedom, and how there are no lasting consequences, because condoms protect everyone from STDs (which they don't, because you'd have to cover the whole peri-area with barrier to protect against those or **gasp!**
After I get this rant out, it'll be better.
I'm tired of being a stepped on Christian. And everyday I'm getting used to the idea that I will face troubles and disapproval. But something needs to be changed in my life. I need to be filled with more of God's patience and grace and accept people. I need to channel my anger energy to something more useful.
Because we all hurt in some way. Because we are all sinners, wrongdoers, people in need of help and healing.
My brain's fried.
And adoption has been made too complicated. Adoption is providing a family for a child without one. Every family has problems, every person goes through a time when their identity is uncertain...but this post really gets to the point of it, Simplify.
It's not just about adoption, but about life:
Focus yourself on God in whatever you do and that's really the best that you can do, that I can do, that any one can do. It's not a last option, "oh, nothing works, so I'll follow God"; it's fulfilling your unique purpose, what God has specifically made you for, that no one else can do.
I feel better now. Know that you are deeply Loved and Known.
1 comment:
hey joan, wanted to stop in and read up!
also letting you know, I have your letter right here, have had it for over a week, but no stamp for sending. So I will be scanning it and sending it via e-mail this time. deep apologies!
It is really silly, to say that anyone today is 'unaware' of the consequences of sex. I am so drilled and practiced in the consequences of sex, I think I could recite it all like a poem.
I think it's just that people love making excuses for themselves. "I'll do this now, and pretend innocence later"
Nor does the media do anything to help cleanse society of the oversexualization of youth that is becoming more and more prevelent.
Obviously you've got a lot on your plate. It's wonderful though that you have the ability to channel your energies into something positive instead of anger. And I have never seen you as a stepped on Christian. If anything, you're one of the strongest people I know.
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